Hey! Did I ever tell you about the time my face quit working? No? Huh. I should probably fill you in on that…

The Surprise

It was 2016. I was a whopping 34 years old. Brian and I were about to celebrate our 15th anniversary. (Yes. I know. We were babies when we got married. But that’s another story. 😏) To celebrate that anniversary, I had planned a trip of epic proportions. This was highly unusual – because we’d never made a big deal of anniversaries. Trips & vacations were not our thing. (Not that we didn’t want to travel. We just worked too much to travel. Not fun. I wouldn’t recommend it.)

Not this year, I decided. Not this anniversary. 15 years was worthy of celebration, and our family was going to take an actual vacation. So, I planned a vow renewal in the Smokies, followed up by a week in Disney World. I surprised Brian with the whole thing. He didn’t even know where we were going until we were on our way. (Cue me patting myself on the back for being awesome.👏🏻😄)

He didn’t know about the vow renewal until the day of the event. I’d taken care of it all: the site, the photographer, the cake, the arrival of our childhood best friend (who was acting as “minister”), the clothes, the flowers… It was an exhausting labor of love that I was happy to plan.

The Disney Days

After about a week in the Smokies, we drove down to spend a week at Disney. It was the trip of a lifetime. The kids loved it. Brian & I loved it. Everything was bliss. Sure, it was a little tiring…but those things are always exhausting. We lived it up, and had a blast. (Tip: If you’re going to splurge on Disney, I’d highly recommend getting the Memory Maker. Also, you’d think I’d be getting paid for all these links. I’m not. Help a girl out, Disney. 😉👍🏻)

What. The. Krunk?

Literally, the day after we left Disney, I woke up in our hotel room. Smiled at my husband and children. Walked into the bathroom to brush my teeth. And, was brushing away, when I looked up at my reflection.

What? That’s not right. WHAT THE CRAP IS WRONG WITH MY FACE?!?! Am I having a stroke? Aaaannnndddd, panic. Everything in my life changed right then & there.

No. I wasn’t having a stroke. I was suffering from something known as Bell’s Palsy. An “unexplained, temporary paralysis of the face.” Nothing on the left side of my face moved. At all. No known cause. Suspicions, but nothing definitive. Not really much in the way of treatment. You can use steroids, if you’d like, or other types of medicine. But, you basically have to wait it out until your face decides to work again. Might want to tape your eye shut. That sucker will dry out & do some serious permanent damage, if you don’t.

Well. I wasn’t expecting that. My next few weeks & months were centered around any potential treatment that would help my face work again. (Tip: chiropractic care, acupuncture, & diet changes did the trick for me. Acupuncture, in particular, was amazing. One little needle – and my eye could blink like crazy! It was a miracle! Can we just leave that needle in? 😉) I’d never really thought about how much I relied on my body’s ability to work together, without my thinking about it. What had once seemed “effortless” now required extreme effort. It was an experience I’ll never forget.

The Here & Now

So…why am I telling you all this? Well! I’m glad you asked! After my Bell’s Palsy episode, my doctors were firm: ‘No. Stress. Don’t do it! We’re not sure what causes Bell’s Palsy, but we do know that you do not need to stress. You can’t. Unless, of course, you’d like your face to stop working again.’

Umm…no, thanks. I don’t ever want to live through that again. But, no stress? None? I have three kids. Is that possible? ‘No idea! But we’d suggest that, whatever you start to stress about, you let it go. Instantly. Have a nice day!’

I think that pretty much brings us up to date. Almost. A few months ago, I noticed I was stressing…and the stress was building. Why? Because we were gathering testimonies at a faster rate than I could process them. I’m going to take a minute here to make this perfectly clear:

Any stress I am carrying is a direct result of me – not you. I love hearing your stories. Love recording them. Love, love, love, love it! I get stressed because I’m a weirdo perfectionist. Your stories matter to me. I honor them, and want to share them in a way that makes you proud. Any and all expectations I feel stem from me, and me alone. I love what I do, and want to continue doing it. Please keep talking to me!!!

There. I hope you really, truly understand that. Because it’s the absolute truth. It’s not you. It’s 100% me. I’m weird. I’m high strung. I care deeply about all the things – and I have to discipline myself enough to calm down.

Anyways, I noticed the stress a few months ago. I should’ve taken appropriate measures then. Nope! I’m not that bright. 🙄 Keep going. The stress kept building, and building, and building. Until…

My Face Did Not Stop Working.

I do not have Bell’s Palsy. At least, not yet. I opted to raise the white flag. Drop back & punt. Alter my plan in order to save my face. I pushed through & kept going until somewhere in Wyoming – when my eye started twitching. Once that left eye started twitching, I was out. No more. No more stress for me. I do not want a repeat of Slack Face 2016 going on. Nope. Nope, nope, and nope.

We prayed about it – and headed back to Arkansas. Time for a rest. Time to see my doctors (and an acupuncturist). Time to relax, stay in one place for a while, and enjoy simple pleasures like knowing my way around without having to rely on GPS. Time to visit with my mother. Time to laugh with our best friends. Time to breathe, quit twitching, sit down & write to all you lovely people, who we’ve met & fallen in love with along the way.

Time to heal. And try again.

Galatians 5:14 is a scripture most Christians are familiar with. We quote it often. “Love your neighbor as yourself.” It’s quite arguably one of the most well-known commands. We tend to focus on the ‘loving your neighbor’ part. You know what, though? This command is twofold. Love your neighbor, yes. But, you also have to love yourself.

I’m not sure how long we’ll stay in Arkansas. At least a few more weeks. Then, we’ll pack up & head out again to wherever God calls us. But, I’m going to take a little time to love myself for a while. I can’t possibly love all my neighbors well until I do.

Prayers are greatly appreciated during this time. My eye is still “sticking” a bit when I blink. I’d really like for it to just…quit it. 🙏🏻 Also needed: prayers as we adjust to “stationary” life, prayers for guidance & direction on how to best spend our time, and prayers that I can actually stay calm & heal – rather than take on 86,217 other projects. 😏

We love you. So much. We’re sorry we’ve been a bit MIA lately. We’ll try to do better to keep you updated. No promises, though. I told you we were a hot mess! If you’re going to follow our journeys, you’d better buckle up, Buttercup! 😉

Interested in sharing your story? Like what we’re doing, and want to help keep the campfires burning? Want to offer a word of encouragement? We’d love to hear from you!